fred schwed where are the customers yachts

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A Wealth of Common Sense

10 Great Lines From ‘Where Are the Customers’ Yachts?’

Posted February 15, 2015 by Ben Carlson

Where Are the Customers’ Yachts by Fred Schwed was written almost 75 years ago. I only read this book for the first time a few months ago and it’s remarkable how well it still holds up after all these years. It’s probably the funniest investment book I’ve ever read (out of an admittedly small set of competitors).

Here are some of my favorite lines:

1. On using statistics to your advantage:  “One can’t say that figures lie. But figures as used in financial arguments, seem to have the bad habit of expressing a small part of the truth forcibly, and neglecting the other part, as do some people we know.”

2. On the value of “I don’t know”:  For one thing, customers have an unfortunate habit of asking about the financial future. Now, if you do someone the single honor of asking him a difficult question, you may be assured that you will get a detailed answer. Rarely will it be the most difficult of all answers – “I don’t know.”

3. On the cyclical nature of the markets:  “When “conditions” are good, the forward looking investor buys. But when “conditions” are good, stocks are high. Then without anyone having the courtesy to ring a bell, “conditions” get bad.”

4. On the usefulness of theories:  “All of these theories are true part of the time; none of them true all of the time. They are, therefore, dangerous, though sometimes useful.”

5. It’s a little different every time: “History does in a vague way repeat itself, but it does it slowly and ponderously, and with an infinite number of surprising variations.

6. On the emotions of losing money:  “Like all of life’s rich emotional experiences, the full flavor of losing important money cannot be conveyed by literature. You cannot convey to an inexperienced girl what it is truly like to be a wife and mother. There are certain things that cannot be adequately explained to a virgin by words or pictures.”

7. On second-level thinking: “Those classes of investments considered “best” change from period to period. The pathetic fallacy is that what are thought to be the best are in truth only the most popular – the most active, the most talked of, the most boosted, and consequently, the highest in price at that time.”

8. On leverage: “A man who borrows money to buy a common stock has no right to think of himself as a constructive social benefactor. His is just another fellow trying to be smart, or lucky, or both.”

9. On short sellers before the Great Depression:  “Before October 1929, nobody objected to short sellers except their families. The families objected to going bankrupt.”

10. On who’s to blame for poor advice:  “The burnt customer certainly prefers to believe that he has been robbed rather than that he has been a fool on the advice of fools.”

Source: Where Are the Customers’ Yachts

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[…] and commentary on today’s financial services industry as well as the economy and markets. This post presents the blog author’s 10 favorite lines from the […]

[…] Ben Carlson plucks a few gems from Fred Schwed (A Wealth Of Common Sense) […]

[…] paraphrase Fred Schwed, there are certain things that can’t be taught, but only learned through experience. Is […]

[…] the  best response to the sentence “A rising tide lifts all boats,” is “Where Are The Customers’ Yachts?”  For those who have not yet read this 75 year old classic – it’s still available, and […]

[…] Further Reading: Experience of Expertise? 10 Great Lines From ‘Where Are The Customers’ Yachts?’ […]

[…] 10 Great Lines From ‘Where Are the Customers’ Yachts?’ – Link here […]

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Where Are the Customers' Yachts?: or A Good Hard Look at Wall Street Paperback – Jan. 10 2006

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". . . one of the funniest books ever written about Wall Street." -- Jane Bryant Quinn, The Washington Post

"How great to have a reissue of a hilarious classic that proves the more things change the more they stay the same. Only the names have been changed to protect the innocent." -- Michael Bloomberg

"It's amazing how well Schwed's book is holding up after fifty-five years. About the only thing that's changed on Wall Street is that computers have replaced pencils and graph paper. Otherwise, the basics are the same. The investor's need to believe somebody is matched by the financial advisor's need to make a nice living. If one of them has to be disappointed, it's bound to be the former." -- John Rothchild, Author, A Fool and His Money , Financial Columnist, Time magazine

Humorous and entertaining, this book exposes the folly and hypocrisy of Wall Street. The title refers to a story about a visitor to New York who admired the yachts of the bankers and brokers. Naively, he asked where all the customers' yachts were? Of course, none of the customers could afford yachts, even though they dutifully followed the advice of their bankers and brokers. Full of wise contrarian advice and offering a true look at the world of investing, in which brokers get rich while their customers go broke, this book continues to open the eyes of investors to the reality of Wall Street.

• Print length 208 pages
• Language English
• Publisher Wiley
• Publication date Jan. 10 2006
• Dimensions 13.97 x 1.78 x 21.59 cm
• ISBN-10 0471770892
• ISBN-13 978-0471770893
• See all details

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From the inside flap.

". . . one of the funniest books ever written about Wall Street." —Jane Bryant Quinn, The Washington Post

"How great to have a reissue of a hilarious classic that proves the more things change the more they stay the same. Only the names have been changed to protect the innocent." —Michael Bloomberg

"It's amazing how well Schwed's book is holding up after fifty-five years. About the only thing that's changed on Wall Street is that computers have replaced pencils and graph paper. Otherwise, the basics are the same. The investor's need to believe somebody is matched by the financial advisor's need to make a nice living. If one of them has to be disappointed, it's bound to be the former." —John Rothchild, Author, A Fool and His Money, Financial Columnist, Time magazine

From the Back Cover

". . . one of the funniest books ever written about Wall Street." Jane Bryant Quinn, The Washington Post

"How great to have a reissue of a hilarious classic that proves the more things change the more they stay the same. Only the names have been changed to protect the innocent." Michael Bloomberg

"It's amazing how well Schwed's book is holding up after fifty-five years. About the only thing that's changed on Wall Street is that computers have replaced pencils and graph paper. Otherwise, the basics are the same. The investor's need to believe somebody is matched by the financial advisor's need to make a nice living. If one of them has to be disappointed, it's bound to be the former." John Rothchild, Author, A Fool and His Money, Financial Columnist, Time magazine

About the Author

Product details.

• Publisher ‏ : ‎ Wiley; 1st edition (Jan. 10 2006)
• Language ‏ : ‎ English
• Paperback ‏ : ‎ 208 pages
• ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0471770892
• ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0471770893
• Item weight ‏ : ‎ 1.05 kg
• Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 13.97 x 1.78 x 21.59 cm
• #56 in Poker (Books)
• #121 in Business & Professional Humour
• #132 in Business Humour (Books)

About the author

Fred schwed.

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Fred Schwed's Where are the Customer's Yachts?

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According to an old joke, a visitor to New York who was admiring the yachts of the bankers and brokers naively asked where all the customers' yachts were. Of course, none of the customers could afford yachts, even though they dutifully followed the advice of their bankers and brokers. The customers had not got rich from the stock market. Although Fred Schwed had a deep understanding of and few illusions about the world of investment Where are the Customers' Yachts? is very far from cynical. Schwed's insight into the psychology of investment professionals and their customers is as relevant today as it was in 1940. He did not say that investment is pointless, or that private investors never make any money. Rather, he cast doubt on the ability of the financial services industry to provide any really valuable advice to its customers. Leo Gough's interpretation of Where are the Customers' Yachts? brings Schwed's insights to life with modern examples. Readers will discover: • How to spend their income, not their capital; • That just because someone works in the stock market doesn't mean they are a good investor; • Why exceptions are the rule; • How to ride the winner and avoid the collapses; • The secret of the 'fat, stupid peasant' approach. Gough explains why investment is ultimately about psychology rather than numbers. This lucid, concise and jargon-free book shows you how you can adopt Schwed's original techniques and become a real investment ace. This interpretation of Fred Schwed's Where are the Customers' Yachts? illustrates the timeless nature of Schwed's insights by placing them in a twenty-first century context and is an inspiring reworking of one of the most influential investment books ever written.

Kindle Book

• Release date: July 1, 2011

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• ISBN: 9781908189608
• File size: 688 KB

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Business Finance Nonfiction

Publisher: Infinite Ideas Ltd

Kindle Book Release date: July 1, 2011

OverDrive Read ISBN: 9781908189608 Release date: July 1, 2011

EPUB ebook ISBN: 9781908189608 File size: 688 KB Release date: July 1, 2011

• Leo Gough - Author
• Formats Kindle Book OverDrive Read EPUB ebook
• Languages English

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Fred Schwed: Where are the Customers Yachts? Summary

Post by captmorgan50 » Mon Mar 20, 2023 2:03 am

Re: Fred Schwed Where are the Customers Yachts? Summary

Post by captmorgan50 » Mon Mar 20, 2023 2:04 am

Post by David Jay » Mon Mar 20, 2023 3:12 am

Post by David Jay » Mon Mar 20, 2023 3:19 am

Post by er999 » Mon Mar 20, 2023 3:37 am

Post by captmorgan50 » Mon Mar 20, 2023 3:40 am

Post by Carol88888 » Mon Mar 20, 2023 4:11 am

Post by captmorgan50 » Mon Mar 20, 2023 3:24 pm

Post by Bill Bernstein » Mon Mar 20, 2023 3:57 pm

Post by captmorgan50 » Mon Mar 20, 2023 7:43 pm

Bill Bernstein wrote: ↑ Mon Mar 20, 2023 3:57 pm Not to steal the OP's thunder, but here's my fave: In 1929 there was a luxurious club car which ran each week-day morning into the Pennsylvania Station. When the train stopped, the assorted millionaires who had been playing bridge, reading the paper, and comparing their fortunes, filed out of the front end of the car. Near the door there was placed a silver bowl with a quantity of nickels in it. Those who needed a nickel in change for the subway ride downtown took one. They were not expected to put anything back in exchange; this was not money – it was one of those minor conveniences like a quill toothpick for which nothing is charged. It was only five cents. There have been many explanations of the sudden debacle of October, 1929. The explanation I prefer is that the eye of Jehovah, a wrathful god, happened to chance in October on that bowl. In sudden understandable annoyance, Jehovah kicked over the financial structure of the United States, and thus saw to it that the bowl of free nickels disappeared forever.

Post by Harmanic » Mon Mar 20, 2023 8:56 pm

captmorgan50 wrote: ↑ Mon Mar 20, 2023 2:03 am • Rarely will it be the most difficult of all answers---“I don’t know.”

Post by Bill Bernstein » Tue Mar 21, 2023 12:10 am

Post by captmorgan50 » Tue Mar 21, 2023 1:48 am

Bill Bernstein wrote: ↑ Tue Mar 21, 2023 12:10 am Thanks for the kind words. I assume you're referring to VDE/VENAX having near zero foreign holdings. I guess I'm fine with that, I'm not willing to pay 30 more bp to get the foreign exposure from say, IXC.

Re: Fred Schwed: Where are the Customers Yachts? Summary

Post by LadyGeek » Tue Mar 21, 2023 1:49 am

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Where Are the Customers' Yachts?: : A Good Hard Look at Wall Street Kindle Edition

It's amazing how well Schwed's book is holding up after fifty-five years. About the only thing that's changed on Wall Street is that computers have replaced pencils and graph paper. Otherwise, the basics are the same. The investor's need to believe somebody is matched by the financial advisor's need to make a nice living. If one of them has to be disappointed, it's bound to be the former." -- John Rothchild, Author, A Fool and His Money, Financial Columnist, Time magazine

Humorous and entertaining, this book exposes the folly and hypocrisy of Wall Street. The title refers to a story about a visitor to New York who admired the yachts of the bankers and brokers. Naively, he asked where all the customers' yachts were? Of course, none of the customers could afford yachts, even though they dutifully followed the advice of their bankers and brokers. Full of wise contrarian advice and offering a true look at the world of investing, in which brokers get rich while their customers go broke, this book continues to open the eyes of investors to the reality of Wall Street.

• Print length 208 pages
• Language English
• Publication date October 10, 2022
• File size 14459 KB
• Page Flip Enabled
• Word Wise Not Enabled
• Enhanced typesetting Enabled
• See all details

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• ASIN ‏ : ‎ B0BHW54PXF
• Publisher ‏ : ‎ Wiley. (October 10, 2022)
• Publication date ‏ : ‎ October 10, 2022
• Language ‏ : ‎ English
• File size ‏ : ‎ 14459 KB
• Simultaneous device usage ‏ : ‎ Unlimited
• Text-to-Speech ‏ : ‎ Enabled
• Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
• Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
• X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Not Enabled
• Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Not Enabled
• Print length ‏ : ‎ 208 pages
• #2,481 in Stock Market Investing (Kindle Store)
• #5,180 in Satire
• #5,891 in Stock Market Investing (Books)

About the author

Fred schwed.

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